Train To Failure and You'll Train For Failure

One thing you will notice about the ChAoS and PAIN training methodology is that there are no "intensity multipliers", or whatever the mags are calling them these days.  CnP is notably bereft of triple-drop sets, assisted reps, forced reps, strip sets, or negatives.  In case you've ever wondered why, and even if you haven't, I'm going to tell you- I don't train to fail.

Training to failure + starvation diet = waif look?  

But wait... that's training to failure, not to fail, right?

Fucking WRONG.  Six of one or half a dozen of the other, it all adds up to the same thing- training in that manner inures you to failure.  ChAoS and PAIN's not about failure- it's about success.  After you've done 43,000 sets to failure, you're likely pretty well inured to failure in physical pursuits.  You might not give a fuck, then, if you just got fucking pinned on a bench, or you keeled over backward out of the rack (which I have seen, and it was made even more hilarious by the reasonable chance that the guy had broken his back or neck, and he was an annoying motherfucker), you failed to make weight for a competition, or you bombed out of a competition, because fuck it- you're used to failing.

FUCK ALL OF THAT.

I don't want to get used to failing to lock out a rep.  I want that to be the sort of catastrophe so epic that it's a story worth telling... one that involved bloodshed, screaming, nudity, and possibly a dragon.  If there's not two of the aforementioned involved, you fail at failing.

Practice makes perfect, right?  Then why the fuck would you practice failure?  It's just fucking retarded.  Practice success with heavy fucking weights at all times, and you will achieve success with heavy fucking weights all the time.  This is one of the reasons I adhere to a strict policy of moving heavy-ass weights constantly- if you do it every fucking day, you won't fear them at any time, whether it's in competition, when you just want to walk in off the street and pull 500+ in jeans, with no fucking warmup, or you need to drag a shark out of shallow water and stab it to death with your bare fucking hands.

Possibly the only man on Earth to attack a shark in the water, drag it onto land, and stab it to death. 

There's intellectual reasoning behind my methodology as well.  Surprised?  The utilization of intensity multipliers when working out increases one's levels of cortisol significantly, which reduces one's ability to recover for future workouts, protein synthesis, and your overall health.  Additionally, training to failure reduces production of IGF-, which has a negative impact on your ability to grow and retain skeletal muscle, in addition to fucking up your strength and power.(1)  So, essentially, by training to failure, you're creating a metabolic shitshow from which you're not likely to recover prior to your next session, fucking up subsequent workouts.  Does this mean you should train less and to failure?  Not unless you enjoy being weaker, due to the reasoning I outlined above.

Thus, leave the intensity multiplies for the fuckbags in their matching workout gear rocking the sub 200 benches and 14" arms- they'll be the ones going down the rack on curls and following that up with some brutal drop sets on cable crossovers.  Shit you see in most mags is just that, and the UnderArmor crew in your gym is living proof.

Camel toe is the opposite of failure.  

Notice, however, that she's about the same size as the Auschwitz victim at the beginning of this blog.

1. Izquierdo, Mikel , Javier Ibañez, Juan José González-Badillo, Keijo Häkkinen, Nicholas A. Ratamess, William J. Kraemer, Duncan N. French, Jesus Eslava, Aritz Altadill, Xabier Asiain, and Esteban M. Gorostiaga, "Differential effects of strength training leading to failure versus not to failure on hormonal responses, strength, and muscle power gains." J Appl Physiol 100: 1647-1656, 2006. First published January 12, 2006